Is It the Shoes?

I am a bicyclist. That is, I ride a bicycle. I am not a cyclist. Cyclists are people who take riding seriously. I've never heard anyone say proudly, "I'm a unicyclist, or a tricyclist, or a bicyclist". I only ride occasionally. I don't know how to repair, or even maintain my bicycle. I don't know street rules, etiquette, or even laws. I have visions of my front wheel coming off as I coast down a big hill. I'm apprehensive at sharp turns. I'm tempted to put baseball cards in my spokes. I used to use a bell, but gave it to my daughter. I have a blinking front headlight, a blinking rear light, and a mirror attached to my Walmart helmet. I want a basket, or side saddle bags, or a trailer, or would even consider a milk crate with bungee cords. I stupidly don't have bright colored spandex, but instead wear regular shorts and a tee shirt. And I wear tennis shoes. Not cycling shoes. Tennis shoes. I found a pair of vintage 1984 Detto Pietro black leather cycling shoes, and I so wanted to become a cyclist with those beauties. But that's like putting Larry the Cable Guy into a tutu and expecting him to show off some ballerina moves. Like Michael Jordan said to Mars Blackmon, "It's not the shoes."  (Update: Sold on ebay on 5-25-11...To a real cyclist)