Four!

I've been in this conversation with a lot of different people, and pondered this question myself. What is golf? Is it:
A. A sport
B. A hobby
C. Recreation
D. Silly time
Actually, it's all of the above. I've come to the conclusion that I've played golf for all of those reasons, ever since I took it up in 7th grade 23 years ago. And I realize that sometimes it's been for a combination of those reasons in the same round. I have taunted many a friends right before teeing off of hole #1 in competition with them, but then claim by hole #10 that I'm just playing for fun, and then by #14 it's goof-off time--if I've been bad up to this point I may as well really stink at it. I am no Tiger Woods, and I have to remind myself that golf, for me, has to be fun. And fun only fits letter D, because I still get too friggin' ticked off if I'm thinking A, B, or C. I can't take myself too seriously, because then I get too stressed. However, golf is an easy game to take too seriously. You see it from just about anyone on the course on any given day. People are getting angry all over the place. At their crappy shot. At their crappy lie. At the crappy course. It's too hard. It's too easy. The wind's changing direction. There's a puddle. The grass is too long. You stepped on their line. They stepped in goose poop. That guy's shirt's not tucked in. The birds are too loud. Someone laughed....They'd cuss out their own grandmother if she was in front of them and playing like a turtle. In no other sport, game, or whatever you want to call it do people complain and get mad so much. The greatest golfer ever, Tiger Woods, makes millions, is good-looking, has a good-looking wife, gets to play golf for a living, but still is often angry at something and occasionally will throw a club. I'll tell you a little secret if you want to have a little more fun and a little less chance of dying of a heart attack on the course. It's how you dress. I came across this picture of John Daly with a big smile on his face. No, it wasn't the first thing I noticed, but it was the second. Here's a guy who doesn't take himself too seriously and who has fun. Jesper Parnevik has fun. Ian Poulter has fun. Camilo Villegas has fun. Payne Stewart had fun. Johnny Miller had fun. The Three Stooges had fun. Tiger Woods though? He's having fun rolling in his pile of money. Golf can be boring enough already (how many of you actually watch matches on television?), especially when everyone's dressed in the same polo and khakis and you confuse one guy with the next. Tiger Woods won't tell you it's true because he doesn't know, but I do. I've been there and done that in pink men's vintage pants and a men's vintage shirt. Golf is more fun this way. "But Tiger makes a lot of dough and he wears ordinary clothes," you mock. Here's the difference though. You and I have moxy. And you and I will never make one red cent from our golf skills to pay for a quadruple bypass that will happen one day if we don't do this. Maybe your new, bold outfit will just be one more thing for that old guy behind you to complain about. And the new you will just laugh at his misfortune, kick your ball out of the rough and into the fairway, and whack away.